Goodbye Rachel

I arrived at the school office after being paged and saw my dad and sister there waiting for me. Rachel pulled me into a hug and sobbed, I’m not ready for this. I think you know what’s happening.

Assuming–correctly–that this was dad taking my sister away from me, my heart sank, and I burst into tears and clung to her very tightly. Our dad was upset about this too and explained, I’m taking you both to your mother’s house so we can get Rachel’s things.

We got into the car and I sat in the back seat with Rachel and we just held each other very tightly. Neither of us wanted to be the first to let go and neither of us wanted to be separated from each other. I didn’t care what the Judge ordered. The truth was that I really wanted to march myself straight to the courthouse and do some things I knew I would regret later. Rachel and I continued hugging each other, and this were when I made my final decision: I loved my sister. I absolutely loved her, and I didn’t want to leave her side for any reason.

I whispered to her, I don’t care what anyone says. We are not going to lose contact from each other and Jessica.

Good, She replied, I don’t care either! We continued to hug each other and made it clear how angry we both were with the whole situation.

I’m being stubborn, I said.

I am too, She whispered.

We both burst into tears when we arrived at the house, and neither of us wanted to be the one who stopped hugging the other. Neither of us wanted to be away from each other.

We both cried as we entered the house, and continued to hold each other, dreading being torn away. Rachel did not want to pack up her room, and I did not want to help her. Don’t leave me, I cried.

I don’t want to leave you, My sister replied, in tears herself.

It got to the point where a police officer had to enforce the court ruling. The officer was compassionate, realizing that Rachel and I were just innocent kids in a tug-of-war between divorcing parents, but it still stung when I had to give my sister one last hug goodbye. Promise we will stick together in school, We both said to each other. We both intended to keep our promise to each other.

It was a very long evening, now that my baby sister was no longer in her bedroom. I sat on what was her bed and just cried my eyes out. I didn’t want anything, and I didn’t want anyone except her. I didn’t respond to knocks on the door, since I knew the knocks were not from Rachel or even Jessica. I felt alone and scared. At least with Jessica departing for college, we were anticipating that. Rachel leaving was completely unexpected and was not wanted.

There was another knock on the door, and again I ignored it. I figured that I would have to cry myself to sleep, and I couldn’t explain why, but I wanted to sleep in the bunk bed that Rachel and Jessica shared in our childhood. I cried as it was time to to sleep, this time being the only kid in the house. I was not ready to be alone in the house as I rested there on the lower bunk that belonged to my baby sister. The only thing I could do was cry myself to sleep, and vow that if I ever got married and have kids that there would be no splitting up like this. As the saying went You don’t know what you got until it’s gonen and that felt so much like the truth right now. I missed both of my sisters, but especially my kid sister since her departure was abrupt and unplanned.